do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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