I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
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