Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize