I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
