Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
