so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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