Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
