Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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