3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
