i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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