i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize