i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
