It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
