that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
