we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
