ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
