what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
