this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
