My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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