...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
