My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
