Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
