Got a toothbrush?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
and she was petting her beer can
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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