I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
