Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize