I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize