I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I can't turn off my feet"
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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