Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
You're like the curious george of whores
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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