life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
