I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
