walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
