Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
