Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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