No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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