what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
