the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
