Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
