She is in my trunk
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
