video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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