At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
