I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
