38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
