You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
