Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
