i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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