You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
