AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
