I need help removing her.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
