can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
