I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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