its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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