This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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