I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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